KALBİM SOLDAN ATIYOR

 

Kalbim soldan atıyor
Olmaz dönemem geriye biliyorsun derler
Yok olmuş gözlerim
Arar seni
Sokaklar bomboş artık
Yalnız karanlık var görüyorsun
Her şeyi çaldılar
Umutsuzlar bütün insanlar

 

Yıkılsa da dünyam
Umut var içimde
Vazgeçme sen sakın
Güven sen kendine

Yıkılsa da dünyam
Umut var içimde
Vazgeçme sen sakın
Güven sen kendine

 

(Ooo Oo Ooo)

Kalbim soldan atıyor
(Ooo Oo Ooo)
Kimse tutamaz beni
(Ooo Oo Ooo)
Kalbim soldan atıyor
(Ooo Oo Ooo)
Kimse tutamaz beni (haha)

 

Kalbim soldan atıyor
Olmaz dönemem geriye biliyorsun derler
Yok olmuş gözlerim
Arar seni
Sokaklar bomboş artık
Yalnız karanlık var görüyorsun
Her şeyi çaldılar
Umutsuzlar bütün insanlar

 

Yıkılsa da dünyam
Umut var içimde
Vazgeçme sen sakın
Güven sen kendine

Yıkılsa da dünyam
Umut var içimde
Vazgeçme sen sakın
Güven sen kendine

 

(Ooo Oo Ooo)

Kalbim soldan atıyor
(Ooo Oo Ooo)
Kimse tutamaz beni
Kalbim soldan atıyor
Kimse tutamaz beni (hahahaha)

 

(Kalbim soldan, kalbim soldan)

Kalbim soldan atıyor
(Kalbim soldan, kalbim soldan)

Kalbim soldan atıyor
(Kalbim soldan, kalbim soldan)

Kalbim soldan atıyor
(Kalbim soldan, kalbim soldan)

Kimse tutamaz beni (haha)

I needed some time to think

So, I did some drinking ‘cuz my world was shrinking

A change of scenery did the trick

All my motives have become so cheap

And it was so hard to cut myself some slack

Knowing that the world keeps spinning

Letting me know that I’m missing a great deal

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

Like the blue sky high up on the mountains

Or the desert sun and flowers

Oh, dear God you’ve got some nerve

Messin’ ‘round my precious ideals

For a girl who’s got no dreams

But has concrete plans ‘bout when to be where

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

It’s as if I’m in a car crash

Hit my head on front window

Caught up in a loop

Broken glass like spiderwebs

Finally, I’m realizing it all

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep

Now the girl reminds me of candy

See my name and look this way

Sitting on the outside, let them play

Pull me, squeeze me, I’m put on display

 

Just let me wanna be, who I seek to be

Fill your head with desires

Think everything you wanna do to me

After all we just display

What everybody expects

 

Follow my brand, take a look at price tag

Waiting to be purchased, I’m put on display

Maybe I’m misplaced, and on crusade

 

Thinking you can shape me as you wish

Fill your head with all horrors

Think of a way you can escape from me

After all we all display

What we fear the most, just let them complain

 

I know your eyes are on the prize

Now a sudden shock

I’m out of my cage

Broke out of your so-called display

I’ll be who I wanna be from now

Planning to play fetch with your souls

Twist your mind and forget what you want

Join me 

Let’s break out

After all we just display

What we run from, the inside

 

Let me out

Let me out

Let me out

Let me out

 

Let me out

Crystal castle

You look so beautiful and serene

Why have you imprisoned me

Your inside is obsidian, ceiling is cerulean

There’s an ash rain

It’s as if everything is dying and coming back to life

Like a phoenix but her wings are on fire even when it’s alive

 

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us numb

 

Crystal castle

Who is your owner

Who made you so twisted that you can fool every man and woman

Your basement is built on the dead

Your curtains reek of sin

There are cracks on your marble walls

As if someone’s screams have caused it

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us numb

 

Looks that kill, with a grin

All she wants is sleep

Daydreaming is a drug

Don’t wanna stop

 

Crystal castle, Crystal castle

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us numb

This is a song about survival

Of the beaten and the broken

 

When shadows embrace your heart

Your eyes are bound

You cannot feel through the mist

You cannot see because it’s dark

Well, your mind knows you are still alive

And without the eyes and the heart

You’re seamless

Even if you hold still

You cannot overcome the numbness

Now we all rise from the grave

 

Like a stripped-down rag doll

Have you ever felt so naked

Since life took its toll, you surrendered

You chose to wear your shadows

And your sorrows like jewels on a jacket

Sweet memories like beads on your hair

Eyes wide shut! Eyes wide

 

Take off the jacket, you need no jewels to feel precious

Just kill the shadows

Don’t be afraid, wear your own skin, own yourself

Drown the sorrows

 

Like a stripped-down rag doll

Have you ever felt so naked

Since life took its toll, you surrendered

You chose to wear your shadows

And your sorrows like jewels on a jacket

Sweet memories like, beads on your hair

Eyes wide shut! Eyes wide

 

Take off the jacket, you need no jewels to feel precious

Just kill the shadows

Don’t be afraid, wear your own skin, own yourself

Drown the sorrows

 

Eyes wide shut! Eyes wide

Just kill the shadows

Eyes wide shut! Eyes wide

Drown the sorrows

Eyes wide shut! Eyes wide

Just kill the shadows

Eyes wide shut! Eyes wide

 

When shadows embrace your heart

Your eyes are bound

You cannot feel through the mist

You cannot see because it’s dark

Well, your mind knows you are still alive

And without the eyes and the heart

You’re seamless

Even if you hold still

You cannot overcome the numbness

Now we all rise from the grave

 

Take off the jacket, you need no jewels to feel precious

Just kill the shadows

Don’t be afraid, wear your own skin, own yourself

Drown the sorrows

 

This was a song about survival

Of the beaten and the broken

I want to lose track of time

I want to stay in this summer forever

Nothing can disturb me except for ‘now’

What do you have to make up for

Can you compensate really

What has never been there, already, already

If you ask the time, it’ll know

How much lacked

How many tears were shed

Oh, we’re still sands in an hourglass

 

How many layers should I go through to find the core

Why is it this hard to give meaning to our existence

Oh, we’re only sands in an hourglass

Up and down, we make the same mistakes and forget

If one of us goes the other way, the other replaces

We’re only sands in an hourglass

 

If you were keen, brave enough

Stood up against the coming train

Instead of running away in the opposite way

You could build your own map

And you could own a train

Now the dusty pages

Seem so thick like wooden

They have so much to say that

They don’t know where to begin

The most important thing is

They don’t know when to begin

 

How many layers should I go through to find the core

Why is it this hard to give meaning to our existence

Oh, we’re only sands in an hourglass

Wait until someone comes and molds us into a mirror

Then we’ll only reflect what we encounter

Even if it means sometimes evil

Sometimes angelic

Through the eyes of the onlooker’s spirit

We’re still only sands in an hourglass

Trapped in this summer

 

Sands! Sands! Sands! Sands! Sands! Sands

We’re only sands

 

How many layers should I go through to find the core

Why is it this hard to give meaning to our existence

Oh, we’re only sands in an hourglass

Wait until someone comes and molds us into a mirror

Then we’ll only reflect what we encounter

Even if it means sometimes evil

Sometimes angelic

Through the eyes of the onlooker’s spirit

We’re still only sands in an hourglass

Trapped in this summer

 

Sands! Sands! Sands! Sands! Sands! Sands

We’re only sands

At crossroads with healing powers

Enchanted, a life alternate

Your fears may disappear

If you can go that extra mile

 

You’re divine

Ugh

You’re divine

 

Scattered bits and pieces into the night I sail

Feeling, entering, on the verge of a world so brave

Now electrocuted one big heart made of glass

What if it shatters and I’m left with no compass

 

You’re divine

 

Navigate the waters so deep

No wind will put you at ease

Feeling hopeful, but still craving

For a sign, there’s no time to weep

 

You’re divine

 

Scattered bits and pieces into the night I sail

Feeling, entering, on the verge of a world so brave

Now electrocuted one big heart made of glass

What if it shatters and I’m left with no compass

 

Soaking burning salt, filling your lungs

Now all have become one big, tainted glass

 

Scattered bits and pieces into the night I sail

Feeling, entering, on the verge of a world so brave

Now electrocuted one big heart made of glass

What if it shatters and I’m left with no compass

 

You’re divine

Ugh

You’re divine

A groom with a white veil, paintings blackened

A father telling tales to his daughter

Lost all possessions, not that it mattered

Gave a kiss goodnight, then it all bothered

 

Once a bright young man was then turned into a vessel

All this time all you did was to sleep on chemicals

Pain and disillusion hid behind his happiness

Every mistake you did will keep on living

 

Until the end of days

Until the end of days

End of days

Days

 

It’s just another day on his pillbox

Crushing every dream, long held at one’s heart

 

Once a bright young man was then turned into a vessel

All this time all you did was to sleep on chemicals

Pain and disillusion hid behind his happiness

Every mistake you did will keep on living

 

Under Pushya sky I was born to suffer

But to heal other such as yourself

 

Once a bright young man was then turned into a vessel

All this time all you did was to sleep on chemicals

Pain and disillusion hid behind his happiness

Every mistake you did will keep on living

 

Until the end of days

Until the end of days

End of days

Days

Underneath the anger and frustration, I feel alone

I’ve just found guilt and shame, no wonder I’m safe at home

 

Tried to tell you a thousand times

We wouldn’t be here otherwise

‘Cuz you only listen to your own lies

 

This is how you deal with every shit that comes near

This is why you don’t fear, this is why you’re fine

You made me feel ashamed of how I always feel

So, I wouldn’t go after what I desire

This is why you’ve given me money, I assume

So, I wouldn’t find the strength to leave your side

You made me believe I ain’t worth listening to

You take pleasure of it, and you never deny

 

Knock, knock, who is there

Blah blah, same as hell

Whiny girl is hollow

Lock, lock, locked it out

Tossed the keys, happy now

All I see is sorrow

 

Tried to tell you a thousand times

We wouldn’t be here otherwise

‘Cuz you only listen to your own lies

 

This is how you deal with every shit that comes near

This is why you don’t fear, this is why you’re fine

You made me feel ashamed of how I always feel

So, I wouldn’t go after what I desire

This is why you’ve given me money, I assume

So, I wouldn’t find the strength to leave your side

You made me believe I ain’t worth listening to

You take pleasure of it, and you never deny

 

No matter how loud I scream

No matter how much I achieve

 

Tried to tell you a thousand times

We wouldn’t be here otherwise

‘Cuz you only listen to your own lies

 

This is how you deal with every shit that comes near

This is why you don’t fear, this is why you’re fine

You made me feel ashamed of how I always feel

So, I wouldn’t go after what I desire

This is why you’ve given me money, I assume

So, I wouldn’t find the strength to leave your side

You made me believe I ain’t worth listening to

You take pleasure of it, and you never deny

This has become a fixation

There’s no relaxation

Obsess over any details

You know there’s no perfection

 

My ways are all but cautious

Don’t want any more petitions

Leave it be leave it alone says my soul but no

I know my mind is a

Friend or foe

Watch me grow

 

My curse

My curse, it brings me down

My curse, it fuels me up

I know it’s the last time

Promising me

Levitating me now

My worst, it loads me up

My pulse, it kills from inside

I know it’s a lifeline

Reverberate, what you see on sight

 

I need something real, but cruel

My nature is vile but true

Deep within me, there’s a

Fire forever burning through

 

So strong, almost ethereal

I’ve become lighter than air

Leave it be leave it alone says my soul but no

I know my mind is a

Friend or foe

Watch me grow

 

My curse

My curse, it brings me down

My curse, it fuels me up

I know it’s the last time

Punishing me

Tolerates me, why

My worst, it loads me up

My pulse, it kills from inside

I know this is the last time

Reverberate, what you see on sight

 

Friend or foe

Watch me grow

Don’t take it on me now

Don’t take it on me now

 

Friend or foe, go

 

A friend or foe you do know

Which one prevails which I’ll become

A fire or dust will grow

A huge storm to come, take it on me now

 

A friend or foe

Watch me grow

Don’t take it on me now

Don’t take it on me now

Tried making up as I went along with the change

But couldn’t align myself with this mess

Dismissal has never been my game

I’m trapped and not able to get my way

So erratic, not what I’m used to

With this lifestyle, no one shall be okay

 

I’m shook and I’m alone my darling

I can’t really escape

I’m broke, I don’t have any liras

But I get to wake up every day

Let’s make sure we are all still sane

Today might be an escape

I’m sure as hell this time

I’m one step closer to change

 

Just when I thought I had it all figured out

Had a plan, that was sure to work out

Oh but no, fate needed stirring things up

Now I think I’ll never be okay

Events leading up to now

They really messed me up

 

I’m shook and I’m alone my darling

I can’t really escape

I’m broke, I don’t have any liras

But I get to wake up every day

Let’s make sure we are all still sane

Today might be an escape

I’m sure as hell this time

I’m one step closer to change

 

Sing with me all your stories

Sing with me all your stories

Help me out

 

I’m shook and I’m alone my darling

I can’t really escape

I’m broke, I don’t have any liras

But I get to wake up every day

Let’s make sure we are all still sane

Today might be an escape

I’m sure as hell this time

I’m one step closer to change

 

Help, help, help, help

Help me out

Be afraid child, but be well

All the misinterpretations of past lives

Which were infused on you, are sick

But you don’t know it right

 

Be in pain child, but have hope

All the dissatisfactions of past lives

They are not your own doing

But you don’t know it yet

 

They’ll say

When you grow up, you’ll see

What you’ve seen or been through was necessary

But you’ll be your own king

Crowned by your own wisdom

So, don’t worry, I’d say

Be a child and for the time being, be afraid

 

Then again

I’m just a messenger

And a passenger in time

Then again

I’m just a messenger

And a passenger in time

 

And a passenger in time

 

Be afraid child, but be well

All the misinterpretations of past lives

which’ve been infused on you, are sick

But you don’t know it right

 

Be in pain child, but have hope

All the dissatisfactions of past lives

They are not your own doing

But you don’t know it yet

 

They’ll say

When you grow up, you’ll see

What you’ve seen or been through was necessary

But you’ll be your own king

Crowned by your own wisdom

So don’t worry, I’d say

Be a child and for the time being, be afraid

 

Then again

I’m just a messenger

And a passenger in time

Then again

I’m just a messenger

And a passenger in time

 

And a passenger in time

I’m jaded by all the things left unsaid

They never listen

All they do is shut you down

Making you go through turmoil

They never listen, listen

 

Oh, they outlived their time

It’s time to break apart

They sure do want a fight

But all I’ve got is words

And they silence you all the goddamn time

 

And I try to

Put ‘em on hold and walk away

Never ashamed, but on the edge

Never cared about their stupid way

Just wanted to be and get it straight

Never have I seen such a place

Useless flesh with no brains

 

I wish I could

Strangle every word I’ve ever said

But I have to speak, I have to tell

So timid, so vivid, and full of hate

Strangle me now, ‘cuz I won’t behave

Accusing myself, putting all the blame

On all the damn things that make me feel this way

 

And I try to

Put ‘em on hold and walk away

Never ashamed, but on the edge

Never cared about their stupid way

Just wanted to be and get it straight

Never have I seen such a place

Useless flesh with no brains

 

I wish I could

Strangle every word I’ve ever said

But I have to speak, I have to tell

So timid, so vivid, and full of hate

Strangle me now, ‘cuz I won’t behave

Accusing myself, putting all the blame

On all the damn things that make me feel this way

 

And I strive for

What balance? Discord is all I’m left

With all the damn things I couldn’t tell

Nothing else in the world can keep me sane

Strangle me now, I wouldn’t mind if I’m dead

If I’m dead, If I’m dead

 

Leaving me alone like a damn

Cotton candy in a child’s hands

Poisoned with all the hate they bear

But you know why, when heated it melts away

 

Terrified of what comes next

I’ve become a meek version of myself

More and more disoriented every hour of the day

Because of all the damn things that make me feel this way

 

Strangle me now, I wouldn’t mind

If I’m dead

If I’m dead

If I’m dead

If I’m dead

SAFE AT HOME

 

Underneath the anger and frustration, I feel alone

I’ve just found guilt and shame, no wonder I’m safe at home

 

Tried to tell you a thousand times

We wouldn’t be here otherwise

‘Cuz you only listen to your own lies

 

This is how you deal with every shit that comes near

This is why you don’t fear, this is why you’re fine

You made me feel ashamed of how I always feel

So, I wouldn’t go after what I desire

This is why you’ve given me money, I assume

So, I wouldn’t find the strength to leave your side

You made me believe I ain’t worth listening to

You take pleasure of it, and you never deny

 

Knock, knock, who is there? 

Blah blah, same as hell

Whiny girl is hollow

Lock, lock, locked it out

Tossed the keys, happy now? 

All I see is sorrow

 

Tried to tell you a thousand times

We wouldn’t be here otherwise

‘Cuz you only listen to your own lies

 

This is how you deal with every shit that comes near

This is why you don’t fear, this is why you’re fine

You made me feel ashamed of how I always feel

So, I wouldn’t go after what I desire

This is why you’ve given me money, I assume

So, I wouldn’t find the strength to leave your side

You made me believe I ain’t worth listening to

You take pleasure of it, and you never deny

 

No matter how loud I scream

No matter how much I achieve

 

Tried to tell you a thousand times

We wouldn’t be here otherwise

‘Cuz you only listen to your own lies

 

This is how you deal with every shit that comes near

This is why you don’t fear, this is why you’re fine

You made me feel ashamed of how I always feel

So, I wouldn’t go after what I desire

This is why you’ve given me money, I assume

So, I wouldn’t find the strength to leave your side

You made me believe I ain’t worth listening to

You take pleasure of it, and you never deny

Safe at Home tells a story of neglect, frustration, abandonment, condescension on the one hand; and the need to feel loved, safe, and cared for, on the other hand. Sometimes no matter how much we get ahead in life; nothing can change the fact that we have never received the warmth we know we deserve. Raising a child is hard work. You may never realize what harm you caused once it’s too late.

END OF DAYS

 

A groom with a white veil, paintings blackened

A father telling tales to his daughter

Lost all possessions, not that it mattered

Gave a kiss goodnight, then it all bothered

 

Once a bright young man was then turned into a vessel

All this time all you did was to sleep on chemicals

Pain and disillusion hid behind his happiness

Every mistake you did will keep on living

 

Until the end of days

Until the end of days

End of days

Days

 

It’s just another day on his pillbox

Crushing every dream, long held at one’s heart

 

Once a bright young man was then turned into a vessel

All this time all you did was to sleep on chemicals

Pain and disillusion hid behind his happiness

Every mistake you did will keep on living

 

Under Pushya sky I was born to suffer

But to heal other such as yourself

 

Once a bright young man was then turned into a vessel

All this time all you did was to sleep on chemicals

Pain and disillusion hid behind his happiness

Every mistake you did will keep on living

 

Until the end of days

Until the end of days

End of days

Days

This is a song about a man, who once was a young, promising boy. That boy grew into a decent man, lived a lavish life, then became a father. He then lost his wealth, his honor, his mind, and finally, his memories. He is “the groom with a white veil”.

DISPLAY

 

See my name and look this way

Sitting on the outside, let them play

Pull me, squeeze me, I’m put on display

 

Just let me wanna be, who I seek to be

Fill your head with desires

Think everything you wanna do to me

After all we just display

What everybody expects

 

Follow my brand, take a look at price tag

Waiting to be purchased, I’m put on display

Maybe I’m misplaced, and on crusade

 

Thinking you can shape me as you wish

Fill your head with all horrors

Think of a way you can escape from me

After all we all display

What we fear the most, just let them complain

 

I know your eyes are on the prize

Now a sudden shock

I’m out of my cage

Broke out of your so-called display

I’ll be who I wanna be from now

Planning to play fetch with your souls

Twist your mind and forget what you want

Join me 

Let’s break out

After all we just display

What we run from, the inside

Let me out 

DISPLAY tells the story of our generation, worn down by the weighty expectations placed upon us. We all embrace a certain outlook towards life & the roles that accompany it, which we assume that belongs to our own. In time, we realize that we are not the ones that nurtured it, but the society alone: the outcome of pure peer pressure. 

DISPLAY as a story is told through the eyes of a doll, put on display, presumably at a toy store. “Follow my brand, take a look at price tag / waiting to be purchased, I’m put on display”. Meanwhile throughout the song, we hear an inner voice that lures us into tearing down the display, preaching us about the value of being ourselves, hence setting ourselves free. In the end, the inner voice breaks out of her “cage”, declares victory, and calls everyone out to join her, and overcome their fears: almost in a manner such as toying with its captivators, the society. 

Growing up I’ve always felt this kind of pressure to blend in with the others, to follow a path that conforms to the ideals of my peers and elders, while feeling a strong need to assert myself in my own unique manner. DISPLAY is the product of such controversy.

Crystal castle

You look so beautiful and serene

Why have you imprisoned me?

Your inside is obsidian, ceiling is cerulean

There’s an ash rain

It’s as if everything is dying and coming back to life

Like a phoenix but her wings are on fire even when it’s alive

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us numb

Numb

Numb

 

Crystal castle 

Who is your owner?

Who made you so twisted that you can fool every man and woman?

Your basement is built on the dead

Your curtains reek of sin

There are cracks on your marble walls as if someone’s screams have caused it

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us numb

 

Looks that kill, with a grin

All she wants is sleep 

Daydreaming is a drug

Don’t wanna stop

 

Crystal castle,

Crystal castle

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us 

Crystal castle, you are an asylum, but you have no meds left

That’s why it’s all hell breaking loose inside

‘Cuz there are no sedatives to make us numb

Numb

Numb

CRYSTAL CASTLE represents the misperception of reality which we build over time and imprison ourselves into. As prisoners of our own version of reality, we willingly embrace it. Detaching from it calls for a painful awakening & realization, and we can only do so by going through different experiences in life. Which is why the escape feels surreal and terrifying, so we numb ourselves. 

As vividly described, we can see inside the castle but not the outside. The castle has obsidian floors and marble walls, resembling opposites: black & white / right or wrong / truth or lie. Even the ceiling is cerulean like the sky, but it’s not the real sky. The more we stay inside, the madder we become. Once we manage to overcome the numbness, all hell breaks loose: everything falls apart. And finally, we can see the castle crystal clear from the outside.

CRYSTAL CASTLE was initially written as a poem, then converted into a song three years prior to its release, thinking of having been through this experience myself.

I needed some time to think

So, I did some drinking ‘cuz my world was shrinking

A change of scenery did the trick

All my motives have become so cheap

And it was so hard to cut myself some slack

Knowing that the world keeps spinning

Letting me know that I’m missing a great deal

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep 

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

Like the blue sky high up on the mountains

Or the desert sun and flowers

Oh, dear God you’ve got some nerve

Messin’ ‘round my precious ideals

For a girl who’s got no dreams 

But has concrete plans ‘bout when to be where

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep 

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

It’s as if I’m in a car crash

Hit my head on front window

Caught up in a loop 

Broken glass like spiderwebs

Finally, I’m realizing it all

 

It’s a cheap trick that makes me sick

My heart is cracking, yeah, I may be weak

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep 

Now the girl reminds me of candy

 

Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep 

Now the girl reminds me of candy

Cheap Trick is the song that started it all. It was written 3 years ago, in a time full of misfortunes and uncertainties. Dark and foreboding, it has brought me back to my first car accident. There was a huge tranquility within chaos, and I had some sort of an epiphany: images of every event that left a mark on me in some way, were swirling in a stream of consciousness in my mind.

This song evokes anger and revolt against the Almighty, who makes us feel that we can’t run away from events that are beyond our control, that we are to be caught in fate’s webs in some way or another. It also speaks of the beginning of the end, of a life known to me up until the very day I’ve written it. That’s why I feel like “Constant feeling as if waking up from a hazardous sleep, now the girl reminds me of candy”. I’m the candy. 

Cheap Trick is a song that takes place in its bridge section, the breakdown: the tranquility within chaos. The car accident as the past, the moment of at which the song is written as now, and today as the future compared to the rest, all happening concurrently.